I have been a little MIA on social media the last few weeks.
The air has changed, the leaves have blown off the trees and gathered in the same places as last year. The sun feels different but familiar in its position in the open sky. Everything has turned inward including myself.
You have missed two weddings, eight birthdays, Christmas, Easter, Thanksgiving, Mother’s Day, two wedding showers, two stagettes, a job promotion and the completion of a journeyman certificate. I have never missed you more. There are so many things I want to talk to you about but I can’t. So, I cry sometimes and journal when I can. Three pictures of you sit on my nightstand along with a couple of rocks from your front yard. I still hug the stuffed duck you gave me as a gift years ago when I go to sleep at night. And it fucking sucks. We all keep moving forward with time and the only way I can bring you with me is in my heart. I have no choice but to move forward.
The last few weeks have been emotional and hard to describe. October 7th was one year since my beautiful mama passed away, and, on October 13th my baby brother got married to the most amazing woman. So much happiness, love, laughter and at the same time, an unexplainable layer of sadness that sits just below the surface. This has been the hardest, darkest year of my life but I am choosing to be grateful for everything this past year has brought me.
It might seem weird to share such intimate details on social media but it shouldn’t be. I want others to know that grief is tough. There is no right or wrong way to move through your healing. There is no time limit or finish line for grief. As you move through grief it changes. One day to the next can be completely different and that’s okay. Never be ashamed or embarrassed. This is your story.
25 6214 hours ago
I have a lot of favourite events that happen on a wedding day. Seeing the brides gown the morning of the wedding nears the top of the list. Have you ever thought about how much a gown can actually tells us about the bride? Is it simple, traditional, trendy, romantic, playful, sexy, soft, intricate or a combination of those things? Most often these details will reflect the woman who is about to wear it and I find it remarkably interesting. Believe it or not, I actually consider the style of dress she is wearing when premeditating my thoughts for their formal photos later in the day. As a example, a flowy, playful gown, allows for lots movement and fun. Something more sleek and sexy pushes me to consider more intimate images. Of course, I still do a combination of images for all my clients but it is something to consider when you’re choosing your wedding gown!! The most important thing though, choose something that makes you feel beautiful. 🖤
It’s not too late! You’ve got a couple of hours to still enter into the big collaborative giveaway I announced last Monday! Check out my previous post to enter your name!
Can’t wait to pick a winner at 6pm tonight. It’ll be announced by story! .
I love love loved working with this dancer and may still have to post a few more from her session just because I can’t not!! Dancer: B E R L Y N
Hello weekend! Off to Saskatoon tomorrow to hang with some lovely peeps and capture some memories! And I hope to catch up with some friends! Let’s cross our fingers this nice weather sticks around! #yxephotographer#nikond750
Almost all the leaves are gone already! At least we lucked out and stuck a few days of awesome weather in after snow less than a month ago. Headed out to enjoy @meewasinvalley with my trail guide (or at least she thinks she is). If anyone is looking for an actual map of all the awesome meewasin has to explore, hit me up! Might have a few still kicking around...
I was blessed with a lot of beautiful summer sessions with incredibly beautiful people. 🌿 Looking back, I’m filled with gratitude. Equally as excited for all the goodness that will unfold in these coming seasons!