Insecure attachment and the ability to take care of one’s emotions are interconnected.
Prolonged negative affect states that are not being comforted by a caring other become permanent traits in the person.
The researcher Allan Schore thinks that the related stress hormones are behind the impaired ability to calm oneself.
The insecure avoidant relationship pattern is believed to have a deficit in the brain resulting in reduced ability to experience positive emotional states and increased vulnerability to depression.
In the insecure ambivalent pattern, the deficit in the brain is expressed in difficulties in getting out of stressful states such as fear and anger.
More about the importance of attachment for our feelings and emotional life in coming posts.
Find more inspiration on how to be free with psychology at https://www.jennyrapp.com/
Now this kitchen remodel is 100% complete after finishing up some trim pieces to deal with a very wavy ceiling and sealing the slate floor. We were able to get a lot done in 4 and a half days. Very happy with the finished product and so is the customer.
➡️ Reframing ⬅️ Über Framing und FrameChanger habe ich gestern schon in meinem neuen IGTV📺 erzählt.
Reframing bedeutet etwas "einen neuen Rahmen geben". Es geht darum Gefühle, Ereignisse oder Gedanken in einem anderen Zusammenhang zu sehen. 🖼️ Man unterscheidet dabei in: ➡️Bedeutungsreframing: dabei ändert sich nicht der Kontext, es ändern sich nur die Gedanken darüber. 💭 ➡️Kontextreframing: dabei wird ein neuer bzw. anderer Kontext gesucht, in dem z. B. ein Problem oder eine störende Verhaltensweise verschwindet oder sich ins Positive wandelt. 🔝
Hast du schon mal Reframing ausprobiert? Erzähl mal ⬇️⬇️⬇️
4 5514 June, 2019
So this #risexminn conference... its undoing me. It is. It’s taking so many areas and #reframing them... which is amazing as last week I designed this coin “Let’s reframe that”. I have a tendency to go to fear, to go to shame, to go to lies I’ve been telling myself for years... so I wanted this in front of me everyday, to keep the message forefront... change your mindset. Reframe that. ....
Then I come to Rise and @nicksantonastasso gets on stage and says “Reframe that”... my mouth dropped open and the tears began to fall. Then he keppppppt repeating it and before I knew it, I was sobbing - #uglycrying in the midst of nearly 4000 women. Gahhhh😭😭😭😭 #undone
Ever get confirmation that you are exactly where you’re supposed to be? 🙋♀️ Come on #day2 ! Whatcha got for me!!! #rise#madeformore#heknowstheway#jesusgirl#risexminneapolis@msrachelhollis@mrdavehollis - again... thank you for your faithfulness and for bringing powerhouses to the stage with you!!! #lifechanging
5 1614 June, 2019
When was the last time you truly got alone with yourself and figured out who you wanted to be in life?
What stopped you from moving toward that person?
Whether we lose someone close to us or we grow uncomfortable with our current way of living, we all ask ourselves the question: “who am I and what am I doing with my life?”. Our guest this week, marketing strategist and host of the Unbecoming podcast, @phoebemroczek , shares with us how she learned to truly understand the person she wanted to become. Phoebe talks about the exact moment she shut out all of the background noise and focused on her calling. Whether it's the self-limiting belief of “I’m not good enough” or the fear of failing, we need to first give ourselves permission to truly understand who we are. Before we are ever able to answer what we are called to do with our lives, we need to first answer who we are called to be in our lives.
To sign up for the FREE 3 day Jumpstart and listen to the Purpose Chasers Podcast episode
***In the Comments***
1 1314 June, 2019
When you have negative thoughts, try and catch yourself and be aware of them.
Then you can reframe them. Example... “This gig won’t be fun without alcohol”
I hope this is the best day of me and hopefull there is a lot of love today
I want to get tremendous happiness. However, the next day my should be aware because my age increases, so me have to be more thoughful than a year ago.
Heute wieder was für die #Weiterbildung getan und die neuesten Informationen zu unseren #Sachversicherungen gehört.
Gibt tolle Verbesserungen für unsere Kunden, gerade in der #Hausratversicherung und der privaten #Haftpflichtversicherung 🤗
Das Schulungszentrum, in dem die Veranstaltung stattfand, ist das GRZ Krelingen bei Walsrode.
Eine sehr schöne Anlage die #christlich orientiert ist.
Das zeigt sich auch indem, wie die Anlage geführt wird.
So wird das Areal teils #nachhaltig versorgt ( weitere Bilder). Auch wenn es gefühlt in der Pampa liegt, lohnt es sich darüber nachzudenken, dort seine Schulungen/Seminare durchzuführen 😉
So, nun freue ich mich darauf, meinen Kunden die Neuigkeiten zu zeigen.
Wenn du auch darauf neugierig bist, welche Neuerungen ich erfahren habe, schreib mir oder ruf einfach an😉
Ahhh!!! I’m ridiculously excited for you to listen to this episode on The Perpetually Empowered Woman podcast!!! Jessica Khouri-Charysz & Katie Tollis-Flabbi, co-founders of @paperbackevents, are daring women and share so much with you.⠀
Whether you are an entrepreneur or not Jessica & Katie have a wealth of inspiration you can start applying to your life, right now.⠀
Turn in on iTunes & Spotify 🎧 by searching 'The Perpetually Empowered Women' ⠀
1 1113 June, 2019
Ever wondered if you were actually speaking the same language as the other person? I’m beginning to realise that communication is way more than what meets the surface of our conversation.
Oblige me and have a watch.
Does this resonate with you? How does your history, belief, emotional receptiveness, and anticipation to the reaction of others influence your ability to listen and respond? In what ways do they show up in conversations?
Take a moment to notice the patterns in your communication. Approach the subject gently. Hold them as non-judgemental observations of yourself and the next time it happens just simply take a deep breath and remember that communication is more than what we hear.
Why do you think that if you've failed at something in the past you will then fail at it again? Saying "I can't" before you've even done something (albeit the first or the tenth attempt) is not helpful, rational nor logical.
If you thought more along the lines of this man who was asked if he could play the piano... His response is brilliant... "I don't know". The questioner couldn't understand how he didn't know. And then the man clarified "I don't know because I have never tried". I love that shift. From I can't to I don't know. I don't know gives you possibility and options that whatever you are going to attempt next COULD be something achievable. Re-framing the mind!!! What challenges are coming up for you that instead of saying to yourslef that you can't do.... You say "I don't know yet". This idea come from the book 'Psycho-Cyberneticd' by Maxwell Maltz and it is a joy to read. I highly recommend it!
Take some time to think of what you're mentally blocking before you've even started. And let me know how you've got on!
What are you doing today? Here’s a glimpse into today’s agenda in just 3 words: Notebook. Laptop. Backyard. There’s just something about summer that sparks my passion and creativity! ⠀
Want to come along for the ride? Check out what’s about to happen in just a couple of weeks on my site. ⠀
Sharing my journey with you makes me enjoy the process even more.
This is such a powerful technique to learn and apply to all sorts of situations: When the ‘toddler brain’ is trying to make all the decisions. When the all or nothing mindset is trying to take hold. When emotions get the better of you and you get into a negative spiral.
I needed this on Sunday (during the sciatica flare up) and spent a bit of time having a pity party with myself before some tough love from my coach. •
It is much more productive to reframe a situation and find actionable steps towards your goals than wallowing in pity and/or going down a self destructive spiral.
It sounds simple but it is certainly NOT easy and takes a lot of work in the beginning but it’s so worth it to have in your toolset to fall back on when you need it!
Das ist doch mal eine #Stellenanzeige mit klaren Ansagen 😉
Ich persönlich finde so etwas richtig gut, doch dürfte dieser #Arbeitgeber bei unserer #Rechtslage sich noch auf Stress einstellen können 🤔
Doch bei dem weiß jeder woran er ist.
Wie beurteilst du das 🤔
I needed this reminder and the universe gifted me with this great quote 🙌🙌🙌 I’ve been laying low on my fitness IG because I have been going through a roller coaster the last few months with #fitness and #nutrition . I almost deleted my account.
I tried a #cut and it nearly killed me. I could barely get through my days. I didn’t want to walk my dog, play with my 6 year old, and I nearly passed out teaching Zumba. It wasn’t for me. I immediately gained the weight back and a couple extra. Surprising? 🙄 and it sent me in a bad mental spiral. But I’m lucky to have a great partner @jkustom and a pretty solid #mindfulness practice so I’m coming out of it.
5 pounds don’t define me or control me. I don’t #train to fit into a dress or for some event. I train to be better than yesterday. To let my inner #badass shine. To be an example for my daughter. To have all the #energy !
So if your out there struggling, I’m here to say, me too. But I’m not quitting. I’m not giving up. I’m #redefining , #reframing , and #recharging .
The only thing better than singing is more singing.
노래하는 것보다 더 좋은 유일한 것은 ‘더’ 노래하는 것입니다
🌷홍대 음악연습실, 스튜디오론🌷
7 3712 June, 2019
Anyone else been going through a dark knight of the soul period? From a few conversations with friends, it seems like quite a few people are feeling the hardcore sads right now. Energetically there is a huge collective purge taking place. ✨
To be raw and unfiltered with you... I don’t remember the last time I’ve felt this depressed. [I’m starting to feel better but man it’s hit me harrrd.] Sometimes there’s no magic pill or way of speeding up our healing, you just have to do the hard work and breathe through it.
I believe we go through painful events in order to grow and heal. I’m just riding the wave, although it feels more like I’ve been dunked at the moment.. The purpose of this post isn’t to elicit sympathy or make you feel uncomfortable (although that’s up to you), but to give this side of myself some air time. Because without it, you get this picture of me that is inaccurate, and I do myself and others a disservice because it means I hide aspects of myself, claiming to be some sort of holier-than-thou superhuman that has shamed emotions. There’s not much to gain by rejecting & shaming your emotions. If you’re going through something heavy, you’re normal, & you’re not alone.
Being a counsellor or mental health worker or spiritual practitioner etc (any form of emotional support role that promotes self awareness & unlearning) doesn’t make you exempt from feeling the feels and going through the trials & tribulations of your journey - and it shouldn’t, because we get so much value, insight and growth from these times! It just means we might have a different perspective, awareness or access to resources to deal with those moments. ✨
So this is a reminder that there is nothing wrong with going through hard times or feeling pain. Me sharing how I feel doesn’t mean I’m incapable of regulating my emotional wellbeing, or professionally helping others, it doesn’t take away from my awareness, knowledge or intuition, it’s simply allowing this emotion to be seen. 👀 Because it’s normal. ✨
So remember: you’re not a complete mess because you’re having a very real breakdown right now. It doesn’t make you incapable to handle social [continued in comments...]
14 8812 June, 2019
Popular Instagram Photos
Where my girls at? 🙌🏽💖🙌🏽
6 3362 hours ago
Girls just want to be CEO, but when your parents operate on #survival mode because it’s all they know, who teaches you how to thrive in your career?
Today I’m extra excited because I signed a new contract for what feels like my #dreamjob ✨ and doing so made me reflect on my journey getting there.
Finesse Your Career: What Mami and Papi Couldn’t Teach Me About Thriving, Professionally is now live on lovedbydestiny.com. The link is in my bio 😉
I share how I uncovered my passion, my #immigrant parents’ role in my #thriving journey, and my secret to finessing every job I’ve had - even the one I hate!
Do you have any professional tips that you swear by? Share them below, or simply leave a 🙌🏽 if you’re excited to read this post!
📸: Photo cred and a huge shout out to Loved by Destiny’s first official intern Byron Mason!!
62 28829 May, 2019
I’m humbled by the amazing women that chose to spend this past weekend with me. A big shout out to you all for your vulnerability, dedication to healing, and your desire to create a life that’s better for you and those to follow. Thank you for your inspiration. 🙏🏽🙌🏽❤️🥰
Words of wisdom. It’s all about #perspective and #rEFRAMING if you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.
0 1,0668 June, 2019
This is a beautiful depiction of how EFT tapping works inside of us.
We can literally take programmed beliefs and emotions we experience and color them in a completely new way inside of us.
EFT Tapping allows our brains to reframe thoughts and emotions that don’t serve us and replace them with new empowering beliefs.
❤️Pick a feeling, emotion or belief that is bothering you.
🧡Begin Tapping on the points as you voice your feelings, worry, concerns or anger associated with this feeling.
💛Keep tapping until you feel some relief. You might notice that the feeling is shifting or becoming lighter. If you cry, burp or yawn, those are all good signs that your energy is moving and shifting.
💚Now do your best to visualize how your new empowering belief would feel. *hint, it’s probably the opposite of how you were feeling when you started 😉
💙Begin Tapping through the points again as you tune into these more peaceful feelings. Visualize your entire body being filled with beautiful colors replacing the darker, heavier emotion, filling up all the spaces of your body, from your head to your toes.
This is just one example of how you can use EFT Tapping. For more help and Scripts, get my free Tapping Scripts at 33scripts.com #linkinbio
🖼 by @how.to.woman
14 3,45031 March, 2019
This is an excellent and transformative way to apply tapping. Those that work with me know that I refer to this as Echo Tapping. Once you’ve identified the age then go for the earliest memory that you can think of... begin tapping through the points and express your emotions around this event as you tap. This is your opportunity to re-write your story. Give your younger self what you needed. The technique is a bit tricky and the results are always better when you work with a coach too.
If you’re interested in working with me and my group of coaches that are specifically trained in this amazing healing technique, click the link in my bio to apply for my Think and Thin Advanced program. #linkinbio
6 7407 June, 2019
|| i simply love this. sometimes reframing a thought or something that has been passing through our minds for what seems like an eternity just really hits the spot. I really try hard to reframe the shitty stuff in my life and use it as simple information, or better yet, think of these things as necessary for the body of my life to one day be complete. i believe, quite fervently, that even the challenging stuff happens for a reason. bees (replete with stingers and all), just like so many other things, are just moments in time in my greater life. I thank them for their existence and better yet, for choosing me. I hope you all out there can find a way to do the same. || #bees#reframe#reframing#life#lifeslesson#information#flower#greaterlessons