I lost all my happiness yesterday.
Was it all my fault?
I've just lost my friends.
Was it all only my fault?
I've lost my sensations.
Was it all really my fault?
I've lost my everything, May be it's all my fault!!
I'm cryin' but still tryin' to smile.
When I look in a mirror but couldn't even recognize myself, felt like numb.
Now I'm sick of cryin' and tired of tryin'
Yes, I'm smilin' but inside I'm dyin'
All this time I was finding myself but now I've realized that ITS ALL LOST.
madina: a mere transition from the day to night, no sunsets, shy mountains, giggling muse of the wind, amalgam of shades of man, soothing purity, aging gold, white mosques, smiling eyes, the date gardens, hidden wells, running camels and spiritual stories of happiness and gold.
When people leave my space
I let them wander
They may return
They know where I am
In the meantime
I try to open my soul
To let others move in
To teach me
And nurture me
I don't let people
Not that I don't want to
It's just I'm afraid
Afraid I may let them down
For them to leave
Afraid of the pain it can cause
But I have grown
And I am learning
Learning not to hurt
When people wander
Learning to read the energy
Of those who
Truely want to stay
Everything will return to you.
Just as it should do.
You will see your eyes-see you,
Your heart understand you.
Your mind unravel what slumbers in your consciousness.
You will find all those things you thought you had lost,
Making their way back to you.
Your recognition of the beauty of your rawness,
will complete you.
This is the greatest gift you will gift
I have spent so long counting the days since you happened that I have stopped remembering the days that I lived without you. The late nights, the beautiful mornings when the sun shone so bright it hurt my eyes, the life-changing experiences, the adventures, the laughs and smiles and tears that fell down my cheeks before you. I kept saying that nothing will ever be the same now that you are not here, but I keep forgetting that nothing was the same before you came – it was different, but it was still beautiful. I lived a whole life before you just fine, and I keep forgetting that. And I must accept that even though nothing will remain the same now that you are gone, it will still be a great adventure and a learning experience for me. Even though things have changed and you dipped into my soul and found the shore, but left me drowning, I know that there are new friends waiting for me, adventures I have yet to take, cities I have not yet discovered, food I must taste, stories that I will hear and experiences that I will have before I can say that I have lived a ‘well-rounded’ life.
And the truth is, I have not seen anything at all just yet. Some of my best days are still waiting for me, and I am hoping that I have left some of the worst behind. So, even though you came for a while and changed everything in a way I never imagined, so did those before you and yet I lived, and so will those after you and believe me, I will continue to live. And I have spent so long counting the days since you came into my life that I have forgotten the days that I have still got left and how much of my journey is still waiting for me. All I need to do is take a step forward, all I need to do is embrace life. Just like I always have every time someone walked away. #rubydhal @r.dhalwriter