Just being a woman comes with no respect in this society.
You have to have the following qualities or assets to be recognised/respected:
• you should be conventionally beautiful- you should be fair (where fair women are considered beautiful) or of dark complexion (where dark women are considered beautiful)
• you should always be "presentable" or the real word is FICTIONAL PERFECT, that requires no body fat (on unwanted areas of your body) no hair on your skin (because of course biologically we aren't mammals who are supposed to have body hair) and your face should look flawless, but God forbid if you apply makeup, better be a "natural beauty".
• you should be smart but of course they will ask you questions just to prove you wrong, you should love sports (boys love girls who love sports and our only mission in life is to impress boys) but then again they'll ask you questions because of course girls are dumb.
• you should sit properly, legs together and back erect (in case your cleavage shows), because no one is interested in educating us in the schools, all they care about is that these "Raja babu" boys don't get distracted.
And after all these restrictions and rules and "lady-like lessons", 8 out of 10 girls are being harrased, catcalled, slut-shamed, molested or sometimes raped. And the society still has the f*cking nerve to blame the victim. Maybe it's high time to teach our boys that a girl doesn't have to fall in any of the criterias to be respected or least, to be considered a human.
Shoutout to my girls that SMILE at you when you walk past them rather than giving you a dirty-ugly look.
That compliment you on your outfit rather than judging when you’re free-ing the nip or showing your tummy AND legs at the same time #scandalous.
That roots for you through thick and thin, instead of bitching behind your back.
Helping another women feel beautiful in her own skin is one of the most overlooked and SIMPLEST things we can all do.
In a society that promotes so much ‘self-love’ and feminism, there’s still too much hating and judging going on between the ladies. So tag that someone that encourages you to be the best version of yourself, but also to just be YOU 💕 #GIRLPOWER#womensupportingwomen 👏🏽
Huge thankyou to @bondilashes@starrey_em for giving me the most natural cat eye look 🙏🏽 @bondisands
🇳🇱🇧🇪 “Als jij zoveel kracht hebt je rolstoel te rollen kun je vast ook heel goed aftrekken!” 🇬🇧🇺🇸 “If you have so much strength to push yourself in your wheelchair you can probably also jerk off very well! ~Anonymous. #stopstreetharassment#amsterdam#iamsterdam#catcalling
Let’s talk about courtship. Hitting on people. Attraction. It seems like a lot of people are really confused by what’s “okay” and what’s not. The problem is, there is no set of rules to interacting with all human beings. Because everyone’s preferences and experiences are different. We live behind screens and at such a fast pace, we have forgotten how to sit with our energy and our feelings. How to listen and observe and understand someone else’s. When we’re trying to understand “the male gaze” and “toxic masculinity” it’s a lot more complicated than “men do bad shit”. They do, but so do women. They do, but they are also victims. We write taglines and snippets to discuss frameworks, paradigms and dynamics that require a freaking research paper to unravel (which, actually, I am working on btw). But in the mean time, how do I personally deal with this? It depends on what “this” is. If it’s unwanted attention (and I don’t feel like I’m in danger), I take a breath and have compassion for the lonely child inside the usually older man that wants love and doesn’t have a better way of seeking it. (If they’re within talking range I ask them how many carats my engagement ring will be which often stupefies them enough to amuse me and silence them.) What about with acquaintances and friends? I’m still working this one out. As a naturally flirty person, drawing lines can be hard. But I’m getting better at noticing where my yeses and nos are. At noticing where I may be crossing a line. At speaking with honesty and vulnerability, even when it’s awkward or uncomfortable and I don’t want to break this crazy sexy cool persona to show the sensitive soul beneath it. This should all just be fun, shouldn’t it? When we learn to listen it will be. I can’t wait for that world. For now, all we can do is work on how we listen. First, to ourselves, then to others. And remember, behind the object (yikes) of your desire is a human person. ::
Need help learning to listen? To align what you feel inside and how you act? To understand what you’re feeling inside in the first place? My avails are opening up next week for new private clients. Link in bio to set up a call or shoot me a message ⚡️
"Street Harassment is never about compliments, or about how pretty you are. It's about the power imbalance between genders." - Trin, 18 Speaking at the House of Commons takeover for the launch of @planinternational
I know this won’t be a popular post, but IDGAF, it’s important.
✖️You should SMILE 🙄
✖️Are you single 🙄
✖️Hey snow bunny 🙄
✖️*dog whistles* 🙄
✖️“Hey beautiful...” followed by “you’re a b!ch” just because I didn’t entertain his existence⁉️ 🙄🙄
✖️One time I was alone in the dark, unloading my car, in the comfort of my apartment complex, when a car slowed down just to yell miscellaneous things to me about my body. I WAS IN ALL BLACK WEARING A UNIFORM + RAINCOAT 🙄
If you have no idea what I’m talking about we should probably talk 🙃 this isn’t even as bad as it gets!! Feel free to share some of the crazy sh!t that’s been catcalled to you. #womenempowerment#womensupportingwomen#catcalling#mondaymantra#mondaymotivation#presidentsday
Gesellschaftskritisch. 1 like = 1 Respekt.
1 132 days ago
Semi related: when was the last time a guy you know called out his 'bros' on their sexism? .
Mine was today when we were playing ultimate frisbee and one of my team member says 'we have a disadvantage cuz we have one woman [me]' and I was so offended I was literally gonna leave. But one of my guy friends was like hey dude that's not cool at all even as a joke and it might not have been a big deal but y'all this stuff feels nice. It makes me happy when guys call out other guys on their bullshit - Cat 🐈🐾
Except the women are the ones with the boot, not just useless victims! Go get 'em girls 🙏 💯
1 232 days ago
It’s been 1 week since our Catcalling Project event and we are so thankful for all the support! The event was super powerful and couldn’t have been successful without the help of PopGym for their awesome self-defense workshop, Castillo for the food, Abrons Arts Center and the super supportive working group members in Perfect City. Head over to @popgymbk page and check out the awesome work they are doing!!!
Our day in town today made us realise that the issue of catcalling and street harassment is still one that people aren't completely aware of, making our campaign and many like ours extremely important.
2 1233 days ago
"I am a gender fluid person with short hair, deal with it. Why do I get harassment and comments on my looks and style? It's not just from boys but from girls as well." - Lyla, 13
CATCALLING IS HARASSMENT!
Hal kecil tapi tetap masuk kedalam kategori pelecehan, tanpa memandang gender. Menurutku, baik itu perempuan maupun laki-laki kalau digodain sama orang asing ya pasti akan merasa terganggu, apalagi kalau kalimat atau gesture yang ditunjukan oleh catcaller sudah kelewat batas.
Hari ini aku merasa dilecehkan ketika sedang berjalan di lingkungan apartemenku, ada mobil yang dikendarai seorang bapak dan dengan percaya dirinya dia mengklakson sambil pasang muka mau nyium nyium sambil merem. Sanggup gak bayanginnya? 😅
Inget banget, dari dulu cukup sering jadi korban cat calling. Dari mulai cuma dipanggil “neng..” sampai yang terparah itu pas dikasih cium cium itu. Dan dari dulu aku selalu ngomong “apaan sih ga sopan!” Aku selalu berani ngomong gitu terutama di tempat umum, KARENA KITA PUNYA HAK UNTUK MELAWAN!
Siapapun itu, perempuan atau laki-laki jangan pernah diam dan takut untuk speak up!
Kalian yang jadi KORBAN catcalling punya hak untuk marah dan merasa dihargai apalagi jika kalian tidak memancing catcallers.
Kalian yang jadi SAKSI catcalling, bayangkan kalau itu adalah kalian atau orang yang kalian sayangi. Ayo sama-sama bantu untuk mengingatkan catcallers bahwa itu adalah hal yang sangat mengganggu dan tidak beretika.
Dan untuk kalian yang SUKA ISENG godain meskipun tidak bermaksud untuk catcalling, ingat bahwa itu adalah hal yang menganggu dan tidak menguntungkan kalian sama sekali. Malah bisa jadi menimbulkan masalah.
Jangan pernah anggap SEPELE hal seperti ini.
“Yah gitu doang tersinggung” “Kepedean amat sih”
Catcalling bukan lelucon! Sesama manusia berakal sehat, pasti ingin dihargai, bukan dilecehkan.
781 284392:40 PM Jan 30, 2019
It’s 2019! Shut yo mouth!
163 459712:51 AM Feb 12, 2019
Caro uomo estraneo,
Non ci conosciamo lo so, eppure già mi hai chiamata amore mio, bellissima, hai apprezzato le mie forme e mi hai descritto tutte le cose che vorresti fare al mio corpo.
Io sto camminando per i fatti miei, sono sola e devo arrivare alla mia destinazione. Mi hai notata da lontano, forse non ci crederai ma anche io ho notato te e i tuoi amici dall’altra parte della strada. Dal momento in cui vi ho messo a fuoco ho iniziato a sperare che voi non mi vedeste, che non mi squadraste, ma soprattutto che non diceste niente. Ho abbassato lo sguardo e tirato fuori il telefono, ho iniziato a fingere di scrivere un messaggio, di telefonare a qualcuno. La mia finta indifferenza però non è bastata, hai deciso comunque di iniziare ad abbaiare verso di me, di mandarmi bacetti e apprezzamenti coloriti. Io non so se tu capisci a pieno il mondo in cui mi sento, uomo estraneo. Tu ridi, per te è un gioco a cui anche i tuoi amici partecipano, ma io mi sento a disagio, mi sento colpevole, ma soprattutto io mi sento in pericolo. Quello che forse non immagini, caro sconosciuto, è che io ho paura di te. Ho paura di voi. Quando ulularmi dietro non vi basta più per divertirvi capita che iniziate a seguirmi silenziosamente. In quei momenti ho davvero il cuore in gola. Fingi di non saperlo, sconosciuto, che il mio pensiero costante quando ti avvicini è cercare di proteggermi? Puoi davvero ignorare il fatto che io non conosco le tue intenzioni e che semmai tu volessi toccarmi, strattonarmi, obbligarmi a stare con te io non sono sicura che le mie resistenze potrebbero fisicamente impedirti di sopraffarmi?
Caro uomo estraneo, tu ridi ed io ho paura. Forse non ci pensi, forse non te ne rendi conto perché in realtà sei una brava persona e per te questo è solo un gioco o forse sei davvero un malintenzionato che potrebbe farmi del male. Ma io tutto questo non lo so, mentre accelero il passo e tengo la testa bassa, tutto questo non lo so, perché tu per me sei appunto, un uomo estraneo. #catcalling
Don’t believe us? Check out @byefelipe or, you know, just talk to some women. #RageOn ✊🏽❤️✊🏻
44 54985:31 PM Nov 28, 2018
Uit onderzoek blijkt dat ongeveer acht op de tien vrouwen tussen de 15 en 35 jaar te maken heeft met straatintimidatie. 🗣 Het kan dan gaan om nafluiten of naroepen, maar ook om betasten. In de gemeenten Amsterdam en Rotterdam is dat sinds kort strafbaar. ❌ Een maand geleden kreeg een 36-jarige Rotterdammer als eerste een boete voor straatintimidatie, nadat hij acht vrouwen had lastiggevallen. #straatintimidatie#catcalling#NOSstories